Final Thoughts from my 26-Mile Punishment

I purposely waited 10 days to start writing this blog to make sure my emotions were in check before reacting to my Marathon experience. For instance, the people who were in Boston with me after the race that asked if I thought I'd do another marathon in my life got the response of: "my body would rather get hit by a truck right now, so no, I don't see it happening."

Ten days later and the response is more of a "probably not" than a "no effing way." I think the better plan is to do more half marathons, maybe get some better times in those first. It seems more attainable than another full marathon.

For those of you who thought I may never run again after the marathon, you were wrong. I ran 4 miles on Wednesday morning, my first physical activity since the marathon. I'd have to guess my legs aren't fully recovered yet. For you sports fans out there, if Al Michaels was diagnosing me, he'd probably say that I am out with a right ankle, right knee and right hamstring.

Speaking of that knee...all I can tell you about the days immediately following the race is that my legs felt stiffer & less flexible than the days immediately following my ACL surgery 3 years ago. That's how sore I was last week. But hey, at least I got a medal that says "Finisher" on it. Now I can add that to all my other finisher medals.

Here are some other random thoughts about my marathon experience:

-The night before the marathon seemed like an important time to get a lot of sleep. It was the one night that I tried to plan out in detail so I would not be rushing around or stressing. I thought I had the perfect plan when I got done eating dinner in Boston with some friends around 8pm. After getting dropped off at my hotel, I was in my room before 8:30, ready to make a couple phone calls, unpack my stuff and get to bed. Sounds like a good plan huh? It would have been, except I hadn't counted on my toilet overflowing upon first use of it (#1 I swear...I did not clog the damn thing). The biggest problem was that I didn't notice it overflowing when I walked out of the bathroom...I actually didn't know something was up until about 5 minutes later when a wall of water came crashing through my bedroom, ruining any & all chance of me getting a good night's sleep. The housekeeping person was in my room for the next 90 minutes trying to dry the carpet. By the time all was said & done, I got roughly 5 hours of sleep.

-The best part of the course in terms of crowd awesomeness was definitely miles 12 & 13 where all the Wellesley College girls hang out....they are so friggen loud, and they hold up awesome signs asking the runners to make out with them. It feels like you complete these 2 miles in about 45 seconds flat. If the whole course was equivalent to this, I would be the guy complaining about how my world record doesn't officially count.

-In the ongoing battle of BU vs BC, I have the unfortunate task of reporting that the BC fans were 100 times better than the BU crowd. The BC fans were so into it, I kept seeing cops having to hold them back on the sidewalks. They just wanted to be part of the event. The BU fans, for some reason, were almost nonexistent...maybe it had to do with me rolling through there long after their first drinks were consumed that day, but it was a light crowd that was very quiet. Thanks for nothing, school that I (read: my parents) paid way too much for.

-After training for many months for this marathon, I felt like I could run up a large mountain and then run 20 miles after that. What I could not do was run 20 miles and then run up what felt like the equivalent of a large mountain. In reality, Heartbreak Hill isn't that steep or that long, it's just that you've already run 20 miles to get there. It was impossible. Me & 90% of the other idiots running the marathon had to walk up a good chunk of it. I hate you, Heartbreak Hill

-I would say the biggest feeling of accomplishment came when I crossed the finish line. Not because I actually finished, but because I didn't have to immediately plop down into 1 of the 40 wheelchairs that were waiting for me. Small victories.

-A ton of people told me the best part of finishing the marathon would be the beer after. In theory, getting some beers with all my family & friends who made it out to watch me was a fantastic idea. In reality, I drank about 3 sips of a 20 oz beer and was basically sleepwalking my way through conversations. There's a funny story about my first night in Europe when I traveled a couple years ago--at my buddy Werner's apartment, I was so tired from the jet lag and being awake for so long that I passed out for 15 hours that first night. And I basically did sleepwalk, something I never do. I'd contend I was more tired after the marathon.

-I finished the marathon in 4:46:36, about 16 minutes slower than I had hoped for. What could I have done differently to achieve the original goal? Well for one thing, I could have trained like a normal person. Instead I trained as if I was living Charlie Sheen's life, probably not the best way to do it. I also probably should have practiced running some hills after running so many miles first.

-For any man that decides to run a marathon, one piece of advice I'd give would be to find a woman runner with a good-looking ass, especially one who's wearing those workout stretch pants thingys, and just run behind her for as long as you can. It works.

-All joking aside for a second, I really do need to thank every single person who either donated to the Playworks organization or came out to support me on Marathon Monday. And for the people who did both, Thank You X 2. And thanks to everyone who spent time with me in the days leading up to the marathon...I know I was very "specific" about certain things like my schedule and what I would eat, and I appreciate you not telling me to fuck off.

-The marathon blog is over, but I've already found a way to continue with the mildly entertaining blogging. I'd encourage everyone to check out the meh blog, co-authored by me: http://thatssomeh.blogspot.com/

(I'll just warn you that some of the content on that blog is even less suitable for children & old people than my typical blog posts)